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Lesson Six - Speak Kindly to Yourself

Lesson #



Self Paced


Continuing on our journey of connecting our inner and outer world, the last lesson we learned about releasing toxins from the body by the use of water. This lesson we are going to explore another holistic approach to outclassing anxiety by way of mantras. Using mantras as a way to speak kindly to yourself. Everything that we experience consciously or unconsciously is stored in the brain. We are so magnificently made that we can decide what we want to recall or not recall, what we want to focus on or not focus on, it is all in our power.

Mantras to Speak Kindly to Yourself

You may or may not be aware of mantras and positive affirmations, and quotes. You also may be so familiar that you read them everyday for motivation or inspiration. Here you are going to experience mantras as a source of self-talk, no longer just reading, but to actually connect with the mantra so you can allow yourself to truly find the energy, and happiness you want to experience.

The term mantra means manas (mind) and tra (tool), which then means, tool for the mind. The difference between an affirmation, and a mantra are that affirmations are motivational whereas mantras are sacred. In this lesson mantras are referred to as sacred meaning worthy of spiritual respect and devotion.

Self-talk is what we are thinking at any moment in our head. We have control over our thoughts. For example, if you were to think back to any childhood experience, you would take the time to think, dig around in your mind to recall the experience. Then you would remember, as you remember the experience, it potentially would become so vivid, that you could remember how you felt, what else was going on at the time, all the aspects of the experience. There is where you are in complete control of your own thoughts. It is not as if you walk around every day with that childhood experience in your mind, talking about it, but rather it is recorded in your brain and is part of your person, part of your existence. Depending on the experience and the role it played in your life depends on the impact the experience has on your life. The way it impacts your life today is how you chose to identify with the experience. Do you choose to accept that the experience happened, is it part of who you are now and allow it to take you over into anxiety and fear. Or do you allow it to be the part of you that helps you understand yourself and the world around you better? Recognizing how amazingly designed you are and powerful that you can choose to loop the experience in your life or allow yourself to let it go, to live in the present moment, because this is where life is and where inner peace comes from. If the experience was one that was less than desirable and is no longer happening then it now is only a memory that can be recalled with nothing to fear. The fear potentially if present is not having allowed the self the opportunity to accept that it happened, and find a healthy solution for it to never happen again, leading to all is well and you are safe.

Activity - Journal - (If you need a Journal you may download one from the Tranquil Course Material Button). Think back to a time that you were anxious? Recall all that was going on in your life? (who, what, how, why, when, and where) Go deep, and allow yourself to be totally honest with yourself and know that no matter your belief about how you think you should feel about the experience you are safe too and worth being truthful with yourself about how you truly felt about the experience. There is no one critiquing you, no judging you, or expecting that you should answer and feel a certain way as you are allowed to feel how you feel and the first space is accepting where you are and how you feel. Knowing without a shadow of a doubt that it is acceptable and you are worth it. You may even cry or become angry or sad, and that too is acceptable. Your feelings are worth your validation that they do exist. Whether or not it was a person, or yourself, an experience, something that happened, whether you liked it or didn't like it, or you thought it was acceptable or not acceptable, dig around in your mind and think of how this currently plays a role in your present life today. Does it come up, is the experience still happening, is it impacting your current living detrimentally? Will it ever add value to your life? If it is not happening and never plausible to happen again, can you let it go completely, see it release from your conscious mind and if it releases how would you feel?

One term used to describe a situation that comes up into the mind over and over again is called looping. This is where the brain gets stuck in a pattern of thought that it cannot release, without paying attention and making the choice to not allow the self to focus on it. In the journaling experience we experienced bringing an event up that we experienced even though it is not occurring now, and we applied releasing it seeing the thought and not judging it letting it come and letting it go and after a while it doesn't come up or impact your life unless you decide to recall and go there. We are so magnificently designed and can control how we want to talk to ourselves and what we want to talk about. Anxiety comes from our inner child, conditioning that we learned and we have identified with the experience in a way that causes us to fear or panic. As adults we are grounded, and can find balance within to know for certain that we are safe in any given moment. With life and all of our responsibilities, we often forget to take the time to connect with ourselves creating unbalance. The best time to work with anxiety is when it is first occurring, stopping, feeling it in the body, acknowledging that it is there and then allowing yourself the opportunity to make an educated decision to make a different choice how you want to interact with the experience.

Breathing is known for releasing stress….stop take 3 to 5 deep cleansing breaths. Honor where you are as awareness of the self is self love and you are worth it. Then decide how you want to feel; do you want the panic feeling or do you want calm and ease, you decide how you want to feel. Then allow that to be your focus.

Ways to go to the place you want to feel, a piece of jewelry you are wearing, or a picture in your mind that gives you that warm and fuzzy feeling, or an experience that you can recall that reminds you of that feeling you want to feel. Maybe it’s a song or a saying that brings you that same feeling you are looking for, it's reachable, reach for it and know your worth and allow yourself the feeling that you want to feel. Remember you want whatever you decide to allow that it is positive self talk. Know for certain that no matter what that feeling good is the right thing to do for yourself, there is never a reason to feel guilty about feeling good. Know that no matter what you are experiencing, it too will pass. We have options we can become frantic, overwhelmed, fearful, anxious and the list goes on and the experience will happen anyway. The only part that you can control is your own part in the circumstance. If it’s a situation not going as you had intended, can you find a way to see that there are multiple ways to achieve any given situation? If it is a relationship matter, can you sure up your role and how you want to respond in a manner of a win, win, knowing that anger, resentment, frustration, judgement and the like have no added value to the self. When the matter is over you will still be you and live with you and you get to choose the way you perceive every one of your experiences the way you want to perceive them, doom and gloom, lesson, experience of joy, the choices are endless and the determination is up to no one else but yourself. There is a saying that you cannot get sick enough to make a sick person well. The same holds true with anger, you cannot get angry, anxious, fearful and the list goes on to impact others' lives. What you can have control over is you, and by modeling inner peace and ease, loving kindness you allow others to see that the joy of life is more precious than anger or sickness, potentially allowing themselves the opportunity to heal. Finding inner peace and releasing anxiety is a win, win for all.

The control that you are looking for when you become anxious is an internal experience and a responsibility to the self. This is not always easy when you want the best for everyone involved. That is a loving trait, the only thing about the trait is that there is not enough control in the world to change a person's perception of their own experience. Again, this is an inside job for everyone. What works for you may not work for the other people involved so your solution, or concern or desire may not mean anything to the other person or the situation. This is what makes the world go around. Our individual uniqueness and when we allow ourselves to accept our worth, that our feelings, desires, wants and needs matter to no one else, but ourselves, then we can allow ourselves to be. The approval, and acceptance and allowing is that of your own self wanting you to approve, accept and allow yourself to be. What determines whether or not you go with yourself is dependent on your beliefs about what you are experiencing. If you have opposite beliefs about what you are experiencing, not truly appreciating yourself and accepting yourself fully, because of your conditioning (beliefs) that you should believe the way you believe, then you are not honoring yourself. This will create anxiety within the body, and you can actually feel it if you pay attention. The mind, body and soul work in harmony with one another, it is a magnificent system.


I have written a book of mantras for times when you are not able to find exactly what you need in that moment of time. They are designed for you to truly connect with yourself and how you want to experience your day. At times life causes us to be overwhelmed and we don’t always know where to turn or what to do. The ebook, “A Cup of Love”, is for moments just like that, filled with positive mantras, sacred for you. The way the book is designed is to locate the feeling that you are wanting to experience. Go within and feel how you truly want to feel. After you connect with the feeling, allow yourself to feel the feeling for as long as you want, enjoy it to its fullest.


You now have six empowering holistic ways to outclass anxiety. Remember this is not a replacement for professional help. Although it can be used hand in hand as all of the approaches are all reachable by you, about you, and by you. All of the answers you are searching for are within your own being. The key is to allow yourself to connect, and accept where you are, which can be achieved by journaling. Release any negativity by way of breathing and meditation. Take care of your internal world by applying gentle, but firm massaging pressure to those points that need your attention. Stop, and breath, take a moment to connect with the whole of your being, be intentional about the yoga poses that are scientific in connecting the mind, body and soul. Drink lots of water to keep your internal system well hydrated and allow for the toxins to leave your body. And finally, no matter what you are experiencing in life, no matter where you are, or what you are doing or even what you remember, be kind to yourself, speak kindly to yourself. When you are unsure how you want to feel, use the “A Cup of Love”, ebook for ideas, and allow yourself to experience life the way you want to experience it. No by circumstance but by attitude and your self worth, you are worthy to be happy, it is your birthright!

Your Instructor

Amber Williams

Be careful how you are talking to yourself, because you are listening.
- Lisa M. Hayes

Amber Williams
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